Sunday, September 21, 2008

Rebirth


'Was talking to Mikey today ( banned him in my peripherals for a few days afterwards...) about our so called social life.. or the lack thereof. I was getting depressed and he (a usual) was trying to cheer me up. Mikey kept rolling suggestion after suggestion. And I kept on giving reason after reason why his suggestions wont work. Have you ever had that "aha!" moment? I did. I told Mikey about it as he was instrumental for my "aha!" moment. A lot of dieters fail... because they try to do something that won't work on them. SIMPLE EH????? It took me years to finally figure that one out, so I guess it's not as simple a conclusion to arrive at(lol!). I rambled on... dieting... depression... restlessness... they won't work unless you custom-fit it to you. Mikey was skeptical but i wasn't. It was my conclusion after all, whahahah!!!!!!!!! But hey, that kept me going for the rest of the night. Did several things all at once.

Okey, so I was getting depressed and I knew why.. and that alone made it even more depressing. I felt restless... and bored... and cluttered... and with no directions whatsoever again. Refocusing won't work because I've tried it before. So I bravely faced my seeming depression and asked myself why I'm not doing something about it. The answer was easier to accept than I thought. Because I was in denial. No, i wasn't insecure about my looks... no, i don't care that i can't seem to find a lasting relationship... no, I'm not bored... no,... on and on and on. STOP!!!! and I did. Time for self-reflection. This time i was more cruelly honest. I created another template for my solutions. And everything felt different. Wow! Human psychology is magic.

Am I still depressed? Yes, but it feels a lot less stressful than yesterday. Do I have a plan..? YES! I am being pro-active again, yey! And Mikey is still banned in my brains, yey! La vie est ce que nous avons à faire de celui-ci!!!

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